Rising Star as Poet; Jason Koo, Ph.D. (구본철 이사님의 아들) is the author of Man on Extremely Small Island, winner of the 2008 'De Novo Poetry Prize'. The recipient of a creative writing fellowship from the National Endowment for the Arts. He has published his poetry and prose in numerous journals, including the Yale Review, North American Review and TMR. He currently lives in New York, Where he teaches at NYU and Lehman College as a professor and serves as poetry editor of Low Rent. (2009) -This poem is downloaded from Google - Jason Koo's more information is at Google, as <Jason Koo, Poet>
I Just Got Out of a Serious Relationship
by Jason Koo
Often when I get depressed I think about throwing Balls at something. Not diminutive superballs But something you can pack in your hand, like snow, Or a wet glob of paint. The look of smithereens...
I wont go out with you! I dont wanna walk Around with you! sez Joey Ramone, which is what The packed ball sez when it bloze my something To smithereens. I thought I should tell you,
I just got out of a serious relationship. With a man. Instead of giving me some good old-fashioned Attention hed stare into my colander all night long Trying to count the number of holes. Honey,
I think I see some constellations! Hed bring this Lunacy into the bedroom, saying, Little Dipper, Big Dipper ... and as if that werent bad enough, he took My six-volume Modern Library box set of Proust
And drew Garfield cartoons all over the margins. Imagine Gilberte strolling down the Champs-Elysees And Garfield stuffing himself with lasagna at her side. I should add, I just got out of a serious relationship
With my cat, who likes to cuddle by licking me Behind each ear, twice, always twice behind each ear. My man, he thought this smooth, so he started Licking me twice behind each ear as well, and pretty soon
You can just imagine, Little Dipper, Big Dipper As each ear was two times getting lickedI was fantasizing About my cat, making love to him in planetariums, So I thought I should call it quits with both man and cat
And concentrate, for a while, on Monica Bellucci. She has eighteen muscles in her back no other woman Has, which makes many women want to throw balls At her, and unfortunately, many men, including the gay
Man who rapes her in that horrible scene in Irreversible. That scene makes me want to perforate that man Into a colander, or shred him like Garfield translating A head of lettuce into coleslaw, because when Im feeling
Depressed, when Im sitting alone in my apartment Enjoying an all-too-serious relationship with my television DVDs, I like to think of Monica Bellucci saying Bon, as she does in that beautiful French film Lappartement.
Would you like to have sex with me? Bon. Would you Like to play Battleship? Bon. Would you like to watch All 24 episodes of the 4th season of 24 back-to-back With me? Bon. Jack Motherfucking Bauer, in the house!
In the 3rd season, Tony Almeida rolls his eyes a total Of thirteen times, our Brooklyn correspondent Gunny Scarfo Reports. A scarfo is what you use when your lasso Has been misplaced and your scarf is all that you have handy.
Not only do you catch your cows, but you warm them, Make them look fashionable too. Have you seen My new Scarrrrfo? Cow Dancing Matilda sez to Cow Patrice. Oh, its divine. Lately, Ive been trying to get serious
With the divine, the Holy Monica of consummate relaxation, As Nat Hentoff says of Lester Young, but she never Calls me back, agrees to do dinner then cancels last minute So she can party with her sister in Branson, Missouri.
I want to say, in true Jack Bauer fashion, You have NO IDEA how far I am willing to go to get you to cooperate! But she just rolls her eyes and says: Look, Jack, I just Got out of a serious relationship, I dont want one of those,
Try cool and detached, positively flip me with surprise